The Lingerie Crisis
by MintyThing
Summary: Sheldon and Amy visit the Victoria s Secret shop for a date night. Amy tries to get Sheldon s motor running and an unexpected villain will appear. Will she succeed and what secrets will be revealed? A/N: Excuse my mistakes, please. I am not sure yet if there will be a chapter two - it depends on your interest :) So just completed one-shot (for now) Enjoy!


„Amy, when you said I will have to collect my jaw off the store´s floor, I thought we are going to the newly opened train store. Or comic book store. Even science equipment would be acceptable, but this…?" his look was judgemental and angry. This shop was definitely the last place where Sheldon Cooper wanted to be right now. His girlfriend dragged him out on the date night, and it was her turn to choose a place. A place they could both enjoy. Well, the theoretical physicist had no idea what is he supposed to do between shelves with daring lingerie.  
"Welcome to the Victoria´s Secret store. Today is the ´buy a new underwear´ night for me, and because we have been dating for three years now, it is certainly appropriate for you to join me and help me choose." She smiled at him and then started observing tiny pieces of fabric with multiple colors.  
"It most certainly is not! You violated the Relationship Agreement, section three – date nights. The date night location should be carefully selected and shall contain enjoyable activities for both, the boyfriend and the girlfriend."  
"What makes you think you will not enjoy this?" he swallowed and shook his head furiously, trying to get a rid of inappropriate images.  
"Amy, please. Plastic dummy dressed in underwear is your idea of fun? Seriously?"  
"Don´t worry, I will be trying it on myself." She whispered as close to his ear, where she could reach because of his height. Then she let go her grip on his jacket and continued to wander around shelves.  
"This is hell." He whispered so his girlfriend couldn´t hear his comment. With an annoyed sight, he followed her path.

"What do you think about this one?" Amy pulled out a grey bra with a black lace around the cups.  
"It looks ravishing, I think you should buy it." Sheldon said quickly and his baby-blue eyes wandered around the shop. He hoped nobody from the university will find out what kind of store he attended. It would be a disaster. "Now let´s go. I think the trains store downstairs is still open." He tried to escape to the exit, but Amy grabbed his arm.  
""No, Sheldon. It does not work like that. I need to try few on, than decide which price is the best and you will add your opinion"  
"I am sure every single lingerie in this store would be grateful for opportunity to hug your womanly body." A shy blush found its way to Amy´s cheeks.  
"Thank you Sheldon. That is really nice of you."  
"Yes, I should hope so. Now, when I passed you a compliment, can we leave?" her puppy face turned to stone again.  
"No." She frowned and took the grey lingerie in her size from the shelf.

Sheldon was sitting on velvet couch in front of the dressing rooms. The store was occupied with girls, only one fellow obediently followed his girlfriend and seemed to enjoy the experience. Sheldon did not get it. Why Amy relays so much on his opinion? He does not care what is under her clothes. Well… that came out a bit rudely in his mind, but still, they are not prepared for physical intimacy of the highest level yet.  
"You can come in!" she called for him and with a sigh he followed her request.

The inside of dressing room was a bit tiny to his liking. There was a red carpet on the ground, huge mirror occupying two walls, plastic black chair and scantily dressed Amy. Amy! Just in her underwear, in her glory looking at him with clean eyes, not hidden behind the glasses. The pair of lingerie was simple and, for his blood floating, extremely effective. It was not the grey design that they already saw, this one was gold. Literally. Glossy yellow fabric with small coppery dots, the bra was lined with a creamy lace. Certainly it was a push up brassiere, and Sheldon had no idea where to look. Panties looked exactly the same, except the tiny coppery bow in the middle of upper line.  
"So, what do you think?" she blinked few times and narrowed her eyes a little bit, so her vision will not be as blurry as it is. She craved to see his reaction. She showed him her bikini area once, but now they are a lot further in this relationship. She hoped her appearance will push the right buttons inside her boyfriend´s brain.  
"You look like a human female version of C-3PO." He expressed in complete honesty, and that was not what Amy expected. She expected him to be slipped off feet and have his way with her right in this dressing cabin.  
"Thank you for sincere opinion. I am going to change now. Please take a seat on that couch again." She pushed him out the dressing room and took a deep, calming breath. This is going to be a long afternoon.

She already tried on lacy black and white lingerie, checkered blue, pink and green designs and even one brown nightie with leopard pattern. Nothing seemed to get Sheldon´s motor running. But she did not see without her glasses – in order to appeal to him – evident proofs of his affection. Sweaty palms balled in fists, labored breathing and fastened blood rushing. He felt more and more uncomfortable and had no idea, why isn´t Amy ready to leave yet. Any underwear, except for the first one she tried one, fitted her perfectly. She did just not believe his compliments, or probably did not understand them properly. He was miserable. And just when he thought things cannot be worse, destiny showed him otherwise.

"What awe you doing hewe, Coopew?" the voice entered his ears like a knife. The speaking problem of his colleague was obvious. Unmistakable. Barry Kripke just came into his view and Sheldon almost suffered a panic attack.  
"Kripke." No hi, no hello. Theoretical physicist was concerned this guy is not worth his time.  
"Yeah it´s me. Now, tell me what bwings you hewe, to the wedge of Victowia?"  
"None of your business. Nice seeing you, now leave." He watched Kripke rolling his eyes and turning on one heel…  
"Sheldon, can you help me hook this up, please?" the voice of his girlfriend froze the blood in his veins and created a huge smile on Barry´s face.

"Oh my Gosh, you awe with a giwl here!"  
"Of course I am, is there any other reason why to attend a female underwear selling store?"  
"I could name some." Kripke waved his phone in front of Sheldon´s face. "You know, not all of us have a giwlfwiend we can bang evewy night." He shrugged his shoulders. "That´s Amy, wight? Youw giwlfwiend? C´mon, let me see hew." Sheldon opened his mouth.  
"Why on Earth do you think I would allow you to see my girlfriend in situation like this?" he found really hard to keep his voice calm and low, not letting Amy know what was happening in front of her dressing room. He stood up in order to shield his girlfriend´s privacy.  
"Dowty giwl like hew suwely wouldn´t mind." Things happened faster than Sheldon expected. Kripke made a lunge towards Amy´s dressing cabin, grabbed the curtain and pushed it away. Now Amy was not hidden behind a piece of fabric. Sheldon´s eyes widened.

"Sheldon what- aah!" Amy screamed in horror, as she quickly crossed her arms in order to shield her almost naked breasts. The pink bra was too hard to hook up, so she wanted her boyfriend´s innocent help. Instead, there was a creepy looking guy staring at her with opened mouth.  
"You lucky bastawd! What a meat!" said Kripke before he was knocked to the ground by Sheldon´s fist. In the brilliant mind of doctor Cooper, words rushed furiously. How dare he? Expose his girlfriend in front of the whole store and have sleazy comments about her! Amy remained silent in shock.  
"Don´t you dare to talk about my girlfriend like this!" he snapped at him.  
"Easy thewe, Coopew. I was not the one who begun spweading juicy stowies about hew. One should thought a giwl who is so wild in bed is used to nudity." Barry held his bleeding nose with two fingers, head pulling backwards.  
"Sheldon, what is he talking about?" she asked suspiciously, bud her boyfriend remained silent. Holding her in a place behind him, tightly gripping her hips, Amy had no idea how overprotective he could be.  
"Leave." A cold command came out Sheldon´s mouth.  
"Whatewew. But when you descwibed her, I pictuwed hew face being mowe pwetty." Kripke shakily stood up.  
"Leave! Or I will call the security." After this, Barry finally staggered out of the shop.

Amy stood here in a pure awe. Her nerdy, bony boyfriend just hit a man who insulted her right in the face! Defended her honor, like a knight from fairytales she used to read.  
"Are you okay?" he asked softly, when he was pulling the curtain so it was covering the dressing room again.  
"Yes, thank you."  
"What did you wanted me to hook up?" he let go off her hips and Amy already missed his touch.  
"This bra. I cannot reach the hook." She showed him and he did as she asks.  
"Here you go."  
"Thanks." She took her glasses on again and looked him deeply in the eye.  
"What was that incident with your colleague about?"  
"Well… remember, when I failed my paper exchanged with Kripke?" she nodded "I made up an excuse why my studies weren´t going so well. I told him we have regular intense intercourse." She opened her mouth in awe "and that you find it very enjoyable." He looked ashamed but it was nothing comparing to Amy´s sad and angry eyes. She took a deep breath. Still standing in front of him with two-pink-shaded lingerie, she began to speak.

"Sheldon, I understand why you did that. But I am really disappointed you spread so many rumors that strangers try to harass me in the dressing room. It makes me feel like a trash." He wanted to say something, but Amy wouldn´t let him. "I believe you will come up with a good explanation of your lies and the fact you concealed me this. After this, we will go to the Cheesecake factory for meal. You will have plenty of time to convince me why I should not punish you according to the Relationship Agreement. Now…" her voice lost the strict undertone "…tell me, which lingerie you liked the most."


End file.
